.I Stole The T.V.

Thu, 31 Jul 2008 20:15:13 GMT

I should just say goodbye and ask that in my pursuit to forget him that he deviate from letting me know that even if it is the slightest, that I am within his thoughts. Is it a year later and it still hurts. I hate that it all appears so dire, it's foolish really.

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 16:27:08 GMT

I started watching the grave of the fireflies live action and I think twenty minutes into it and I was already bawling my eyes out. Oh lordy... here we go.

...oh j-drama.

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 02:09:33 GMT

So I'm kinda mad that I've started watching Gokusen live action again and I can't tear myself away.

.so....

Sat, 28 Jun 2008 14:27:32 GMT

So... I woke up today and saw jenny craig's number written on my right butt cheek.

.It was fine, but it just fell apart.

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 05:41:08 GMT

I fell in love with a man a couple years ago and I find that I still have feelings for him. Who knows whether or not I've made the right decisions in resuming to feel for him, to interact with him, but I feel a definite sensation of growth and of depth. In him I see the things of which I aspire to contain. With him, I feel inspiration, hope, as well as longing. I think that maybe the things I endure while with him, although not dire as they once were, help me to find solace in what they may do for my efforts in adapting to autonomy. To have seen my own pain before anyone else's has given me a profound sense of grief. It is not my place to bestow a burden of concern for those who love me, for those who see me now with a sense of accomplishment and hope. In diverging from my life in Lillington to the now post James era, I have learned a great deal about the importance to catering to one's own happiness, to having one's own life separate and independent from those of whom we once believed to have fed us. Things are uncertain for me lately, the idea of resuming a broken relationship haunts me, but the idea of working together to rectify the bond between myself and a man who has been found, this is what gives me hope. In retrospect I had taken advantage of our relationship towards the middle and he during the latter part had taken advantage of me. Why the relationship ended, why he needed to be apart from me, I truly understand. I have forgiven him and most importantly I have forgiven myself. I trust that his intentions and his heart are always in the right motive. He has never laid a hand on me, and any mental abuse I may have endeavored surely was just a product of my own insecurities. But when it ended it broke me. I picked up the pieces of my life from where he left me, from where I was to begin again: a small room with pink walls and one lamp with a tattered shade. Apart from him I began to see who I was, who I wanted to be, but there was still the sensation of losing him that led me to unsavory actions and from each one I reflected upon it's consequences. I learned to love my family again and I gained new friendships and rekindled old ones which became more pertinent. I find hope in forgiveness in those who have trespassed against me, just as they forgive my trespasses against them. History may be repeating itself, however I feel I can change things this time around.

Sat, 07 Jun 2008 20:07:53 GMT

I was trying to type in a URL when I looked up and this was what came out: l,m\\\\\\ok

...weird.

Tue, 20 May 2008 14:40:16 GMT

sooo I'm single again. haha~

Sun, 04 May 2008 14:00:09 GMT

...Every fucking morning at 9 a.m. my fucking neighbors from downstairs play their damn repetitious music for hours and I can hear/ feel it coming from living room floor. I'm about to beat some ass.

.Why I love the bathroom.

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 17:08:29 GMT

because...

you can take a shit and post an entry on livejournal at the same time, multitasking in style.

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 08:57:40 GMT

...seriously when you're not in the fucking room especially when it's 4 fucking a.m. in the fucking shit ass early fucking morning when I'm trying to sleep, turn off the the fucking light and computer.

and tell those birds to shut the fuck up. >_<
It's called conservation of energy and not pissing me off, thanks.

so...

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 05:37:09 GMT

I'm thinking about entering in the art contest at Wake Tech. I'm supposed to send in some sort of art depicting anything pertinent to women. I hope I come up with something good.

.it's a guy thing.

Sun, 06 Jan 2008 04:58:31 GMT

I guess I'm just convenient sex to some people. The whole thing is my fault, I let myself get into these situations and hardly think twice before engaging in them. Yeah, I'm an idiot, I get that.

.Where's all the happy?.

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 17:29:49 GMT

I'm seriously excited about this Christmas, first time I've bought my friends all presents with my own funds.

.Fuck, fuck, fuck, and fuck.

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 09:50:04 GMT

It's 4:48 in the morning I just woke up after 2 hours of sleep and I can't seem to fall back. Tonight was fun, it's just suddenly everything that has gone wrong is left hanging on my mind.
....AGH.

Sat, 08 Dec 2007 04:43:12 GMT

I am seriously going to kill me some bitches.
This douche in a hat totally cut me off while I was in the right hand turning lane at a red light.
...Mother fucker there's a reason why there's one lane going left and one going right and a stop light. When red, you stop, mother fucker. Then this asshat totally is going into the same apartment complex I'm headed towards and tries to speed up so that I won't catch up with them, guess again, mother fucker. Oh, and this bitch almost hit me as I was turning right at a green light while they, on the opposite side, tried to make a left...

Today is not my day, I'm about to stuff my face once Kathryn gets off work.

.man problems.

Sat, 01 Dec 2007 16:29:11 GMT

It sucks, I'm dealing, I'm being dumb, whatever.

.People who hire you are sometimes dumb.

Mon, 19 Nov 2007 20:17:50 GMT

So apparently I'm now employed at Aeropostale for the holiday and am scheduled to work this Friday... Well it'd be fine and everything, although it conflicts horribly with with schedule at Kanki, considering I'm working all day. Well I think I do want this job solely for the discount and if I have to work on the most frustrating day of the fucking year, why not. I'm getting paid better at Kanki, this side job will help me for funding presents. God, I hate the holidays. Oh yeah, my cousin called me to let me know I was working with her this Friday, not the manager, my cousin. Kanki already put out the schedule for this weekend this past Friday. Damn.

I'll work it out in the end.

.ARGH!.

Fri, 16 Nov 2007 03:17:57 GMT

Somehow I've agreed to go to High Point tomorrow... and then right back. FUCK. Ah well, At least I'm not driving my own car there.

.Christmas List.

Tue, 13 Nov 2007 21:49:21 GMT

Here, bitches.

CD's:

-Waking Hour, Vienna Teng
-Anything Allison Krauss & Union Station
-Canon, Ani Difranco
-Anything Corrinne May

Clothes:

-v-necks, I love 'em.
-Sweaters, gay ones, only not really.
-Jackets, it's cold outside.
-T-Shirts, Target's got some cute ones.

Material Objects:

-Atarashii boyfriend.
-wrist, neck accessories.
-I'm thinking about getting my ears pierced...
-I still want that Donald Duck tattoo...

-....coffee?
-Shit to make drinks with.

.Swallowed Pride.

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 03:36:21 GMT

...So I'm considering just staying home for this semester and saving up for shit and going to the northern campus. Having my car in the condition it's in makes a difference. I think staying home for this semester is the smartest option I have now.

.It might be late, but I just found this gold.

Tue, 06 Nov 2007 13:31:19 GMT

Alanis singing "My Humps."

That and I just registered for classes.... I may be an idiot because I've got classes lined up from 11a.m. until 9p.m. However I will only have classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I figure I'll make myself more available for work and have more days to do homework and shit. That and I'm debating on whether or not I should really pursue this one online course.

.News.

Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:12:22 GMT

So some shit has happened lately. I'm now officially a home-wrecker, I just started my first day at Kanki, I drove to Camp Lejune this past Friday where soldier boys were plentiful, and my last day at Crossroads 20 is this Thursday.

Congratulations to Katie! We should go out for drinks or coffee or something. I decided to not buy you a twelve pack of tab after all.

I am so freaking tired and am so ready to get this holiday shit over with. -__-
I've also concluded that I am forever cursed by men whose name begins with "J."

Ani DiFranco!!

Thu, 04 Oct 2007 16:57:23 GMT

Ani DiFranco is coming to the carolina theatre November 14, 2007. I really want to go but am not so keen on going by myself. The only tickets available now seem to be balcony seats, so not the greatest, but I feel I won't really have another opportunity to see her live. It's about 35 plus convenience fees. If anyone wants to go with me let me know.

Tue, 02 Oct 2007 11:38:39 GMT

If you can read this then I probably hate you right now, or will eventually at some point during today, thanks.

.Les Miserables.

Thu, 06 Sep 2007 13:23:10 GMT

So there's a wake county student production of Les Miserables at the Raleigh Memorial Auditorium on Sept 28th and 29th. I'm thinking of going to the Friday (sept.28th) 10:30AM performance if anyone wants to go with me? It's $16 for general admission and $10 with student ID.

And then tentatively in November I'm planning on seeing Rent with a couple of friends. We're looking to purchase our tickets soon, I'm hoping for Orchestra seats, but will not go further than maybe the front few rows of the Mezzanine section. If anyone wants to join, let a bitch know.